Skip to content

God help me


Sirens in the night

Yet again another sleepless night. Sirens wailing in the distance. I used to be able to ignore them. It was just background noise, the price paid for living in a city with fire departments around every corner. Now I hear them and I want to cry. Knowing by experience there is a story, a life attached to wherever that siren is headed.

May 6, 2018 was when a siren screamed in the night for my family. It wasn’t even for us it was too late. That piece of shit who promised to love and protect our precious Rosaura had already killed her. We had called 911 all day looking for guidance. I should have never looked to the law I should have just said fuck it if I’m arrested and broke in. Maybe she’d be alive.

I used to be ok talking about that day, but now the shock has lifted and it hurts. I wish God would have taken my entire family that night so we could all be at peace. Alas here we are, missing our baby girl who was full of life and God’s light. Trying to keep out family strong when a huge piece is missing.

It feels like a dream. On may 6th my baby girl was murdered by her ex boyfriend. The one time I depended on the police. They failed us. I failed her. I feel so sick inside. She was the light of our lives. Only 18 and she taught us a better way to live. I miss my baby so much!!! It’s not fair there is no safety I am not who I used to be

Prayers for all effected by the shooting in Connecticut (Poem)

A falling civilization

The end has come not for the world but for humanity

The murder of children shows mankind’s depravity

When the law took God from schools evil began to invade

People began to forget for our sins Jesus had paid

The blood of the lamb was shed 2000 years ago

If we do not tell all we meet of that miracle how will they ever know

Instead their heads are filled with the sins seen on TV

All the while in heaven God cries “Please my children come back to me”


April M Barbosa © 12/14/2012

In memory of all who have been murdered with prayers to all their families




The life of the young and sick ((poetry))

The life of the young and sick

We watch as life for others goes round and round

All the while our lives seem like they are slowing down

Doctor, doctor, help me

Waiting for hours in a crowded lobby

Hoping for a doctor who cares and treats us like a friend

Into the exam room and quickly herded out again

Treated as a number not as women and men

We pray for a cure adamantly

All we want is to be healthy

© 8/26/12 April M. Barbosa

I am just a mom (poetry)

I am just a mom

Wise words whispered through the trees

I am just a mom

It echoes in the breeze

The voice of a woman of unknown age and race

I am just a mom

A woman clarifying her place

Mom, such a small word with a huge meaning behind it all

Mom, the one who will run through fire to catch her children before they can fall

Motherhood brings a love no other can replicate

But it can also bring a pain so strong nothing can placate

To be a mother is to bear your soul, to let someone into the deepest recesses of your heart and mind

A mother’s love is the strongest you will ever find

Come here my child, hold mommy’s hand

I promise to explain life to you, the best way I can

I will give you all the wisdom that I know

And I promise to always be here by your side

To guide you the best I know how

I know I will make mistakes along the way

But you have to promise to remember I am just a mom

© 8/7/2012 April M. Barbosa

A lost soul ((poetry))

A Lost soul…
Vacant eyes where once there was a glow
You are now a stranger someone I don’t know
The darkness has sucked you dry
My heart shatters when I hear you cry
Hold your hand out let us pull you out of that hole
Hurry before it’s too late before the demons take your soul
© 2012 April M. Barbosa