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I missed

December 24, 2011

I went and sat with you today

and the feeling of being watched wouldn’t go away

That’s how I knew you were there by my side

and that you’ve always been there every time I’ve cried

I told you all about how I was feeling inside

and how lost I’ve been since you died

The cemetery is the place I go to chase the confusion away

I know you understand everything and won’t think bad of me no matter what I have to say

This tattoo I got is more then just art to me

It’s a proclamation of my love and respect for you that I want everyone to see

Grandpa you are the one who understood me and the anger and pain in my soul

Now that you are gone absolute comfort is something I’ll never again know

I remember helping you build the cuartito in the back from floor to roof

You showed me I could do anything and that cuartito is proof

Never did you talk down to me even when I was as young as 4

You always told me the truth and taught me stuff that benefited my young mind it hurts that you won’t be around to teach me more

You showed me to be strong through anything and not to listen to gossip cause it would bring you down

And I know gossip always made you frown

So grandpa I keep my mouth shut and my views in my head

and brush off all the bad things I know people have said

I hurt because not  many people understand me

It sucks knowing the true me is something shallow minded people will never take the time to see……

© April Barbosa 2009

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